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The List | Things There Should Be A Word For But Isn't

As the new batch of dictionary entries are released, we have a few suggestions of our own

The List | Things There Should Be A Word For But Isn't

Yes it's that time of year when faddish words find their way into the headlines as part of the new batch of Oxford English Dictionary entries.

Today it's the turn of 'omnishambles' and 'twerking' to get their moment in the sun, joining a total of 1,000 new words that may or may not live into next week let alone next year.

But despite these constant new additions, we still think there are a few important gaps in the English language that urgently need filling. 

Here's our list of the things most in need of an expression:

 

The look someone gives you at the start of a conversation when they realise you’re drunk and they’re not. (Soberiority n.)

The part of your trousers that has been dipped in a puddle and becomes frayed. 

The piece of leg exposed between top of sock and bottom of trouser. 

The exaggeratedly rigid posture adopted by six year-old boys when asked to pose for a photo. 

The moment between buying a lottery ticket and checking your numbers when you’ve managed to convince yourself you’ve actually won. 

The disappointment when you think you’ve been taken off hold only to find out they’re just changing the hold music.

The condition that makes people aggressive when on public transport. 

The realisation three days into an expensive holiday that you’d rather be at home 

The volume your voice increases when you’re telling an amusing anecdote in the vicinity of a beautiful woman. 

The talent for counterfeiting regional accents, especially when telling anecdotes. 

The face you always pull when looking at your reflection. 

The uncomfortable feeling you get around a man wearing a trilby. 

The panicked effort to form an incisive opinion on exiting the cinema foyer with your date. 

The decision to divert an incoming call to your answer phone. 

The moment you reach into your pocket and realise you’ve lost your mobile phone. 

The expression used for conveying surprise and gratitude at receiving a present you really don’t like.

The contrary urge to champion something, or someone, popularly despised. 

The migration of fluff towards your naval. 

The dread of someone mentioning your new haircut.

The desire to decorate homes, cars or desks with childlike things. 

The involuntary expulsion of a tiny pearl of snot when laughing suddenly. 

The bald patches at the top of your thighs. 

Both revolting and erotic, esp. the sublime point in between. 

The strange sense of pride felt when recollecting something shameful you once did. 

Indulging in flirty chat on your mobile phone in a public place. 

The look you give a ‘chugger’ that signifies ‘No!’ 

The half-limping, twitchy walk peculiar to junkies and crackheads.