Oh God. It's happening, isn't it? The moment we all saw coming, but ignored for so long.
A trail of mangled chewing gum leads from the car park of the F.A HQ all the way to Greg Dyke's office, tracking the path of fate foretold. Steve McClaren, Roy Hodgson - mere hurdles, crushed under the weight of destiny's Matalan running shoes.
Sam Allardyce is England manager.
And Big Sam remembers all those who doubted him, and all those who stayed loyal to the cause. And the latter half – the men listed below – are getting a call-up to the England squad, no questions asked…