We've all heard about the hilarious boasts of late North Korean leader Kim Jung-Il. That his birth created a literal rainbow. That he potted 11 hole-in-ones in his first game of golf. That he never had a single poo in his whole life.
And that's a lot of bizarre bollocks for son and now-leader Kim Jung-Un to live up to – but bless the man, he's trying.
According to the Metro, the despot's former personal chef Kenji Fujimoto claims that Jong-un has boasted about consuming 'ten bottles of Bordeaux' in one sitting.
Mixed feelings about this one, as you can imagine. On the one hand, it's clearly nonsense. But on the other, it would certainly explain his haircut and ridiculous policies, and it's nice to finally have a contender for Obama in the 'World leader we'd love to go on a sesh with' rankings.
And what's more, we kind of like the idea that this is how the conversation went down.