United Airline's New Incentive To Give Up Your Seat Is Much Better Than A Punch In The Face

It's money... lots and lots of delicious money

Possibly due to the fact that they were the architects of their own Greek tragedy of a PR f**k-up, United Airlines have altered their renumeration policy for overbooking seats; moving away from the tried-and-true assault model that was becoming a bit outdated, and instead offering customers lots and lots of wonderful money.

Up to $10,000 (£7,700) to be exact. Hell, we'd probably take a side-order of security guard knuckle sandwich for that much.

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The offer of increased compensation arrives after rival airline Delta outlined plans to offer up to $9,950 in such cases.

United said it would "increase customer compensation incentives for voluntary denied boarding up to $10,000", and also promised to try and avoid such instances of overbooking.

"Our goal is to reduce incidents of involuntary denial of boarding to as close to zero as possible and become a more customer-focused airline," the carrier.

Tell that to Simon the rabbit, guys.