The best man's speech, a social minefield for even the most skilled and articulate of public speakers. Play it too straight and you're a bore (no one wants that), yet those brave and half-cut few who try and force the laughs are at even greater risk; the risk of the awkward, tense silence... which is exactly what guests were treated to at Pippa Middleton's wedding.
According to The Daily Mail, James Matthews' best man, Justin Johannsen, kicked off the speech with this absolute humdinger, saying: "With the wedding shadowed in secrecy, I can reveal, and wish the bride and groom a happy honeymoon in North Wales.
"At least that's where I presume they are going as I heard Spencer saying that after the wedding, he was going to Bangor for two weeks. Enjoy the Welsh coast, guys."
Justin. Sweet, sweet, foolish, unfunny Justin... you're doing Pippa Middleton's wedding, pal. What the f**k are you up to?
But that wasn't the end of Justin's stand-up set, oh no, oh no. The piece de resistance was to arrive when Justin compared Pippa to a dog.
"Now to the love of James' life", Justin said: "beautiful, energetic, loyal, soft-mouthed, comes on command, great behind. But that is enough about James's spaniel, Rafa, I'm here to talk about James' love, Pippa."
Wedding speech - or any speech - 101. Do not ever compare people to dogs.
Oh well Justin, at least this is just a minor embarrassment that's been kept amongst your friendship circle.