How To Heckle Comedians, By Comedians

Stand-ups on the best ways to abuse them at this month's Edinburgh Fringe

Alex Horne

“My worst nightmare happened at a recent children’s comedy show. At the start of my 10-minute slot, a boy shouted, ‘You look like the faun on the phone advert.’ For the next 10 minutes he and his friends shouted ‘Faun!’ at me. Then I hobbled off, like a faun.”

 

Tom Craine

“I once heard an audience member turn to his wife and say... ‘I think I might kill myself.’ If it wasn’t a heckle, it was a strange time for him to start that conversation.”

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Robert Delaney

“Are you insane? I’m going to tell you how to heckle me the most effectively? Shame on you for even asking. But since you asked, the best way for you to heckle me would be for you to exit the theatre, and walk 35 miles south. Then take your pants off and attack a police officer.”

David Baddiel

“I used to tell a story about an open mic being heckled with,‘Everybody hates you – you must know from school!’ This story has since been repeated by others, except told as if the heckle was directed at me. So, the collective unconscious has decided that the heckle makes sense for me. Very unfair: I was deeply loved by everybody at school, and only got my head flushed down the toilets once a day. So that one would disturb me if I heard it now.”

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Mike Wozniak

“When finishing a set entirely about the fact my mother-in-law lives with me and nothing else, a gentle voice piped up, ‘Does your mother-in-law live with you?’ Simple. Devastating.”


Chris Ramsey

“I love a heckle. They are win-win for me. Two possible outcomes: heckler shouts something funny and relevant to the gig. Whole crowd laugh. I laugh. Win. Heckler shouts something that is not funny/an insult/an indecipherable drunken noise. I make them look like the fool they so clearly are in front of hundreds of people. Win.”