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This Weird Inkblot Personality Test Will Reveal Your Soul
Or, y'know, just help kill 5 minutes
The internet is awash with tests that promise an insight into your personality. Of course all they really do is reenforce your own self-image while highlighting your fundamental vanity.
That said, this inkblot series from a new coffee table book call Psychobook is more interesting than most - not to mention a lot shorter.
Look at the images and pick what you see in them from the lists below. And if what you see isn't even on the list, you might want to consider therapy. Or at least a new internet personality test.
Explanations adapted from Will Hobson and Psychobook, and shortened for space.
If you see...
A roast chicken: You may have a few doubts about what you're doing, but overall, you feel very centered and clear about what you need.
A screaming cartoon cat: You're a problem solver and you like for your voice to be heard. You thrive on negotiation and conflict, and you may come off as abrasive sometimes.
A faceless woman, a judge, or a person in a wig: You've got no time for patience. You set high standards for yourself and expect others to do the same.
A woman who has clubbed her husband to death: You're not interested in a Sunday morning, easy going kind of love. You want some sparks to fly (so you can kiss and make up later).
Someone's jaws being approached by a pair of forceps: You're all about being true to yourself, and if people don't like it, well, that's their problem.
A rocket or a tower: You're a hard worker and highly respected, professionally, but you may need to lighten up a bit in your private life.
If you see...
A strong man flexing: You're highly capable and competitive. The bar is set high for you, but you're always up for a challenge.
A pair of rams butting heads: You're self-disciplined and reliable. You know what you're doing, which inspires clients and colleagues, but you're also a very nervous, stressed person. Don't worry — only those close to you can tell.
A scorpion: You're very in tune with yourself, but you can be thrown off by small changes in diet or sleep because you're physically very sensitive.
A lobster or shrimp: You're romantic, but guarded. You're not sure if you want to sacrifice your peace of mind for the unpredictability of a relationship.
Fallopian tubes: You're at a standstill right now — privately or professionally. Reality often falls short of your expectations and your achievements don't seem like enough.
If you see...
Two figures leaning forward, possibly in prayer: You're a patient and cerebral person. If you care about something, you don't settle for anything less than the best.
A racing car or two furry cubs, babies, or devils: You've got a great imagination. You're instinctively metaphorical and can easily see things from other people's points of view.
A dentist's or barber's chair: You're sensitive and generous, and you take things painfully to heart. Your transparent with your feelings, and prefer simple, laid-back environments.
A woman lying down with her legs open: You're easily distracted. You crave balance in your life and you pay special attention to physical sensations.
Two dark forces about to invade a figure: You're constantly starting something and leaving it unfinished. Everything's a "work in progress."
If you see...
A beetle or scarab: Success comes naturally to you. You're hardworking and you know how to handle almost any situation. You set plans and follow them through.
A pair of emus facing each other while wearing feather boas: You love glamour and the high life. You know all the hottest spots in town, but you've got a few inner struggles going on.
Two pairs of hummingbirds, wings beating: You love beautiful things and you're constantly on the move, searching for them.
Sunglasses, a bra, or a beard: You're a bit materialistic. You like to dress up, but you often seek external solutions (a new car or some new clothes) to internal problems.
A skeleton or bones: You feel like you're on a merry-go-round; like life is always repeating itself. You're worried that it'll all come to a grinding halt and you think you need to take more emotional risks.
A flying figure, an alien with stubby feet, or a bikini-wearing woman: You're highly dependable in a crunch, but you can also be flighty on a day-to-day basis. You like getting in touch with friends you haven't talked to for a while.
If you see...
Springtime pansies or a bird of paradise: You're charming and thoughtful, but modest. You love discussions and generally like people and what you can learn from them.
Pressed flowers: You were the object of a lot of attention as a child, and you may have overly high expectations of yourself.
A moth, butterfly, or dragonfly: You're a very independent person. You're drawn to the limelight, but you know it comes at a cost. You can't stand being told what to do.
Eyes in darkness with blinkers on: You live inside your own head and think things over exhaustively.
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