It’s only just been aired, but fans are calling episode three of The Last Of Us not only the best episode of the whole series, but the best episode of TV this year (granted, we’re only at the end of January, but still).
It starts with the discovery of a mass grave and a flashback to 30 September, 2003. At first, it looks like we need to prepare ourselves for a harrowing tale of massacre, but what actually unfolds is a deeply touching story of two middle-aged men falling in love at the end of the world, tracking their story for almost 20 years and following it through to the relationship’s devastating end.
With some outstanding work from Nick Offerman as Bill and Murray Bartlett (last seen as the harried hotel manager Armond in The White Lotus) as Frank, their depiction of finding love in a hopeless place could well end up being the sub-plot that outshines the rest of the series. So to honour our friends who found their soulmate as the world around them burned, here’s a timeline of their love story.
30 September, 2003: Preppers gonna prep
Four days after outbreak day (26 September) there’s one person who’s not been herded up from their local village and left in a shallow grave: Bill. “Not today you New World Order jack boot fucks,” he comments as, solo, he watches the action unfold on CCTV camera from his prepper’s (sorry, “survivalist”) underground lair. Now it’s lootin’ and hustlin’ time.
Four years later, 2007: The meet-cute
While not many great love stories start with the phrase “I'm not infected”, even fewer begin with 60 per cent of humanity being wiped out by a zombie killer fungus. Still, Bill’s literally captured himself a guy, after Frank falls into his booby trap hole. After assessing that he’s not carrying the lurgy, Bill reluctantly lets Frank in for a meal. And what a meal! Who knew preppers were such good chefs – and with a nose for an excellent vintage too?
As we've learned from Come Dine With Me, all the best dinner parties have after-meal entertainment, and this couple quickly find their song: Love Will Abide by Linda Ronstadt. After Frank butchers the track on the piano, Bill steps up and nails it. Anyone ever think they’d be sobbing hot tears over a video game TV series? This is just the beginning.
Frank realises that Bill is not singing about a girl, and kisses him. Given the last kiss on this show went down as “the worst in the history of cinema” this is a welcome relief, and they go to bed, where Bill tells him it’s his first time with a man, and Frank says he’ll stay for a few more days.
Three years later, 2010: Double date
We cut from Frank and Bill making love to a lover’s barney. Looks like Frank stayed a lot longer than a few days, and they are now in a full-blown relationship, arguing about domestic issues. Frank wants to tidy up the house and garden – also teaching Bill the valuable lesson that “paying attention to things is how we show love” – because he’s made a friend over the radio. It’s Joel and Tess; they’ve travelled over to have a little al fresco lunch date, albeit with a loaded gun lying on the table. Still, Joel manages to soften the gruff Bill a little and, wouldn’t you know it, by forging links with the outside world, Frank’s ensured that the couple will go on to live with all the necessary provisions for even longer.
Three years later, 2013: A strawberry by any other name…
Frank and Bill are trying to shift their dad bods, and Frank’s also getting into the cottagecore movement with his little garden out the back, growing strawberries. Bill worries that he's getting “older, faster” than Frank.
“I was never afraid before you showed up,” Bill tells Frank in another, right-in-the-feels moment.
But then, as predicted by Joel, the raiders show up. There’s a shoot out and Bill is hit protecting Frank. Call Joel, Bill tells Frank, thinking it’s the end for him.
10 years later, August 29, 2023: The last act
Bill is still alive! But Frank doesn’t look like he’s doing so well: he’s in a wheelchair, unable to walk and has difficulty using his left arm. Bill is his carer, chopping up his food, checking he takes his medication, lifting him to and from bed, but one morning, a decisive Frank tells Bills he’s taken most of the night to get himself out of bed and into the chair, as it’s his last day. He wants one more good day, then he wants to die.
We follow the pair as they choose suits from the deserted clothes boutique, and marry themselves. After their DIY ceremony, Bill cooks up rabbit, the same meal he cooked for Frank on the day they met, and as Frank requested, he’s crushed up enough pills to kill him and put them in the wine. But, it’s a proper Romeo and Juliet moment, as Bill then reveals that he’s also drunk the wine, as he doesn’t want to live a life without Frank: “You were my purpose,” he tells him. “I should be furious,” says Frank, “But from an objective point of view, it’s incredibly romantic.” They both die, again as per Frank’s wish, in each other's arms in bed.
A few weeks later: the epilogue
We get a final glimpse into Bill’s thought process in his last letter, which he writes with the hope that Joel will find it: “I used to hate the world and I was happy when everyone died, but I was wrong because there was one person worth saving. That’s what I did, I saved him and I protected him, that’s why men like me and you are here, we have a job to do and god help any motherfuckers who stand in our way.”
And there we have it, the love story for our post-apocalyptic times. Alexa, play Linda Ronstadt.
The Last Of Us continues weekly on Sky Atlantic and NOW TV.
