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This article contains heavy, frequent, massive spoilers for the first episode of House of the Dragon, so if you've not watched it yet don't go any further.
We're back in the Game of Thrones groove, and House of the Dragon sees most of Westeros starting the scramble to swap their vintage Ercol for the Iron Throne.
A lot happened in that first episode. There was death. There was betrayal. There was a pair of bloody testicles on a plate.
(That's the second example of a knacker attacker on a major TV series in 2022, after Jack Nelson went after Billy Grade with a garrote in Peaky Blinders. One more and we've got ourselves a crimewave).
But who came out on top at the end of it all? This is the first power ranking of the new season.
1. King Viserys Targaryen
Clearly, he'll not be absolutely buzzing come the end of that episode, having lost his wife, newborn son and brother (to varying degrees of finality). But he's still on top, baby! Don't need a family when you've got a big easy chair made of swords! Anyway, now that there's nobody else left his daughter finally counts as a human being!
2. Princess Rhaenyra Targaryen
Must be nice to finally get taken aside and given the pep talk for power only when the race to succeed your pa is a two-horse race between you and a sock with googly eyes on it. Still, Rhaenyra's got the gig for the time being, even if her auntie Rhaenys looked mighty pissed off at the big do. Side-note: did it feel to you like Rhaenyra and Daemon were getting a bit closer than uncle and niece ought to be? It definitely, definitely felt like there was a frisson there when he was giving her that necklace. We've definitely been there before in Westeros. One to keep an eye on.
3. Otto Hightower
The Hand of the King remains in post and has a steady hand at the tiller. Hightower was proven right about Daemon and succeeded in having him booted into exile. He does seem a bit of a party pooper, but he's the grown up in the room. Then again, so was Ned Stark. Or rather, so will be Ned Stark in about 170 years' time.
4. Daemon Targaryen
Yes, he's been dumped in the arse-end of nowhere for taking the piss out of his brother's dead wife. Yes, he went a bit too Daily Mail in his meting out of summary justice. Yes, he seems unlikely to give up being a total prick any time soon. But! He's still got the loyalty of the gold-cloaked Night's Watch up his sleeve, and if we've learned anything from coups d'etat gone by, it's that you don't give the ruthless bastard a private army.
5. Rhaenys Targaryen
We didn't spend a great deal of time with Rhaenys, but there's a bit of a vibe developing that suggests she's very much not over being passed over for any kind of top gig. She and Daemon might share common cause, and two jilted Targaryens on your back are probably two more than you'd ideally want as a king.
6. Alicent Hightower
Her dad's position as Hand of the King is strong and her mate's just been declared as heir to the throne. That feels like a classic example of one of those situations where you tell your mate you're delighted for them and you kind of mean it but you absolutely would not want to swap places for even a single second, like if they pivoted to Bran Flakes for breakfast or became Erik ten Hag's director of football.
7. Ser Criston Cole
Don't know the dude particularly, but the new chosen heir to the throne Princess Rhaenyra has a bit of a horn for his floppy locks and that's never an unwelcome position for an ambitious young knight. He's going to have to do a lot more before we stop mentally calling him Sir Carlton Cole, though.
8. Lord Corlys Valeryan
Some nifty triangulation at council and a couple of artfully raised eyebrows aside, not a massive amount moving here just yet. One to keep an eye on.
9. Mysarea
Close as she is to Daemon, it's going to do her bugger all good now he's been punted to nowheresville. You can't imagine Daemon's going to take it all lying down, but as of now Mysarea's up brothel creek without a brother of the king for a paddle.
