By The history of the World Cup is stuffed with moments where, when it's really come down to it, a person's internal logic and reason circuits have burst into flames. Frank Rijkaard spitting at Rudi Voller in 1990, for instance, or Luis Suarez decapitating Giorgio Chiellini in 2014.
However, for spectacle, timing and sheer futility, few can touch the attempted, landed then aborted somersault throw-in at the climax of last night's match between Iran and Spain.
The Iranian defender Milad Mohammadi decided the best time to crack out his somersault throw-in was with 30 seconds of extra time to go in a tight game with one of the tournament favourites.
With 20 seconds of faff including a kiss to the ball, a small prayer and a final smack of the ball to his forehead, the Akhmat Grozny full-back launched himself into a tightly tucked forward tumble which was, presumably, then meant to segue smoothly into an air-splitting Exocet of a throw into the penalty area.
That's not what happened.
He then bottled out of actually throwing the ball because he'd lost all his momentum after almost landing on his arse, then, visibly shaken by the spirit of banter having left his body as soon as it had arrived, threw the ball back to a teammate on the halfway line who didn't even have time to take a touch because the referee had blown for full time following the endless pre-throw-in rituals.
It was a night of drama, with a very satisfying goalmouth scramble in front of the Iran goal, an Iranian goal ruled out by VAR for offside and the appearance of a small bird on the pitch at the beginning of the second half.
After evading the grasp of Gerard Pique, who'd attempted to capture the bird with a teddy picker-style double-handed clasp, the bird was scooped up and transported off the field by Spanish playmaker Isco with the firm-handed authority and whispering reverence of a young Chris Packham.
