There's so little joy to go around right now. But every once in a while, a noble creature steps up, sacrifices itself for the greater good, and gives us all something to believe in.
And that is... great. But even more frequently, an ignominious cluster of self-tanning cells inserts himself into our national narrative and then we all just have to sit and deal with it. That part, well, it tends to suck. Until tonight. Because yesterday night, Donald Trump got up in front of the whole damn world and gave his State of the Union address. And during at least the first half of that address, his tie was all fucked up.
It was so great.
Remember: This is a man who chooses to be Sunny-D orange in the off season. He wants to be perfect, even if the rest of us question what "perfect" means in his context. So even if he's still lookin' like a tangerine, that level of asymmetry is killing him. He will never forget tonight. And I'm laughing so hard I'm fucking up my own tie.
I want to write about this in depth. I want to go back to school and turn this into a thesis. But that's not gonna happen, probably. So what is going to happen is me just delighting in giving you all of this "Donnie's Tie Is Fucked Up" content.
