Organise, piss up, brewery, a, couldn’t, in a — top five election gaffes

An election, like any other British endeavour (and we’re thinking of the forthcoming Olympics here), has numerous opportunities for pitfalls of the most heroically stupid kind. This one, the most peculiar and complicated for some time, has been memorable for some particularly dozy gaffes. . .

9 April
The Labour candidate for Moray, Stuart Maclennan, refers to elderly voters as “coffin dodgers” and voters in the North of Scotland as teuchters (a highland man who likes a good drink, fight and a shag - according to the OSD). Cameron, Clegg and Diane Abbott also get it in the face on his Twitter post. Stuart will be mostly spending today at home in front of the telly.

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27 April
Philip Lardner, the Conservative candidate for Ayrshire North and Arran describes homosexuality as not “normal behaviour” on his website. The clinically insane can still vote for Stuart though, as it was “too late” to remove his name from ballot papers. . .

28 April
Gordon Brown describes 65-year-old pensioner, Gillian Duffy, as a “sort of bigoted woman” after she asked him about vulnerable people not receiving benefits because non-vulnerable people are receiving them, including “all these Eastern Europeans what are coming in”. A poll was carried out for The Sun but was left unpublished when it found a small majority deemed Brown’s first-day-at-school-type error “a storm in a teacup”.

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4 May
The Labour candidate for North West Norfolk, Manish Sood, describes Gordon Brown as Britain’s worst ever Prime Minister. His comments effectively draw attention away from Brown’s speech to Citizens UK - widely reckoned to be his best of the campaign. Doh!

5 May
The day before the election Simon Bennett, the head of the BNPs online operation, resigns - and takes the website with him! A sole remaining link sends the various mistletoe growers, rune collectors and holocaust deniers to his own site where he describes Nick Griffin and election fundraiser James Dowson as “pathetic, desperate and incompetent” and claims it had been a “nightmare” to work with them. Astonishingly, he sounds surprised.