By Every football shirt at World Cup 2018 says something about the nation it represents.
Some say: "We have no time for gaudy theatrics" (Panama). Some say, gasping: "Guys, have you heard about the '90s revival???" (Spain). Some say: "We got these cheap when JJB shut down" (Tunisia).
These five, on the other hand say: "You might be beat us on the pitch, but you'll never beat us on the streets."
Presenting: the 5 coolest strips at Russia 2018.
Nigeria home
Nigeria's shirt might have gone so far overground - the three million preorders, small item on the evening news about the queue on Oxford Street, text your mum about managing to cop one, kind of overground - that it's hard to classify it as still being 'cool', but it's already the star of this World Cup for a reason. Look at it. Just look at it. Then look away. Now blink. It's still there. It always will be.
Germany away
A rare example of more being more. Adidas have gone big on the 45-degree stripes and oblongs on their shirts this time around, but while the Spain and Colombia strips are still pretty restrained, this one for the tournament favourites is anything but. Behold: stripes! Chevrons! Triangles! Thomas Muller's face! All with an on-trend mint-turquoise anchoring things nicely.
Japan home
Incorporating traditional patterns and textures has given us some fairly mixed results down the years. Never forget that Mexico shirt from '98 with the Aztec face on the stomach. However, the mixing of Sashiko - a form of Japanese folk embroidery - with a dotty pattern pulls this effort into an altogether more refined category.
Peru home
This is a very seductively uncluttered retro effort. It demands to paired with enormous bloomer-style shorts and placed on the back of a pomade-slicked, barrel-chested captain with a thousand-yard stare and an ex-service revolver in his locker. The simple badge, the sash and the gold thread hark back to a time when leather balls caved in players' skulls, when breaks in play for drinks meant breaks in play for drinks, when death threats between players, fans, referees, coaches, reporters and people who just happened to be passing were actually followed through on. Better times.
France away
This one steals in just ahead of Croatia's gloriously evil, Nick-Cave's-chessboard away shirt. Be honest: if you lost the Nike and FFF logos and chucked an APC one on there, this would go for £150 and you'd be happy to pay it. The rupture between the poise and élan of France's kits and the fact you just know the entire squad are waiting to destroy Didier Deschamps' career the moment they crash out makes it all the more alluring.
